Okay, so let's talk hotels. And by hotels I mean hotels, not restaurants,which are also called hotels. What you want to look for, if you are me, for instance, or anyone else traveling with a computer, is a working electrical outlet. The cheaper places don't necessarily have one, so you can't recharge your stuff. Now, by cheap, I mean 100 to 150 rupees, which is 3 to 5 bucks. For this number, in Paharganj, you can stay in Navganj, which is down a back alley past a mini garbage dump where cows graze and also an open urinal. You get a room whose filth is difficult to describe. Now, there isn't trash lying around or anything, it's just the walls. They haven't been painted since, I'd say, 1955, and backpackers from all over the world have done graffiti all over them, which is amusing. Here's some of it: 

• This is Major Tom to ground control . . . (followed by the entire song written in stanzas)
• Trahit Sua Quemque Voluptas (anyone help me with that one?)
• man is a bird without wings, and a bird is a man without sorrows . . . 
• I love you! Don't cry!
• Free Tibet! Free Flandres! Free Bretagne! Free Corse!

There is a lot of stuff about overcoming sorrow, giving the impression this is a place of last resort. A nasty gray blanket covers the window. As per standard,there is one bare flourescent tube and one bare light bulb. If I ever see a lamp shade in India I'll drop dead of shock. There is a bathroom, however, and it's as clean as can be expected. No bugs, and that's the main thing. Okay, now when I say wall, you aren't picturing what I mean. A wall is an ancient thing that's been there since before time began and it is not a decoration, it is a tool. If one needs to drill a hole for a light socket, then remove the socket and leave the wires hanging out, then whatever. If something gets splashed on there and drips down and leaves drip marks . . . whatever. It will be that way until the end of time. If you have to tape a lot of stuff up there and then leave the little rectangular tape marks all over, whatever. Never wash a wall, never touch a wall if you can help it. A wall is a vertical receptacle for dirt of all kinds. It's not a big deal, you just get used to not touching things. I learned that on my first trip. Don't touch things you don't need to touch and none of this should bother you.

Okay, anyway, moving up, a place like Traveller Guest House-- here, for Rs 450 you get enough space to sleep three, but not swing a cat. You get a western toilet, geyser with hot water, a tv, and set of glasses and a pitcher. I wouldn't watch the whining in Hindi that constitutes TV, wouldn't put my water in any receptacle but my own, and a western toilet is simply a nuisance when you are using the Indian splash-water method of cleaning yourself, so I say its a waste of money, unless you are traveling with 3 people, in which case you are golden. Best case scenario is a place called Yatri Sarai hotel, where for just 200 you get hot water, clean room, working outlet, but no window. Then you have the hotel Scot. I liked this place so much I checked in even though I wasn't planning to spend the night. Someone there actually has a sense of aesthetics. I mean, the walls are somewhat newly painted and there is a ceiling fan and some blankets on the bed and curtains and an Aircon machine that juts out into the room itself like Big Brother Watching You. It looks something like what you picture when you picture a hotel room, and just Rs 300. That's my all-time pick, so if you go, check it out. Across the alley is a cute cafe where I met an 82 year old lady doing it on her own and not exactly loving it. But was she ever spunky.