Blogging from Mid-way Between Everywhere

Here in Amsterdam, on my layover, I’ve made the decision to consume one of those sketchy 5-hour energy drinks-- in order to stay up for what would be my night but will soon be my day---that claims to be full of b vitamins. Vitamins my ass. The second guessing and American-cultural-awareness thing has begun, as with hours to kill I spent 12 bucks on a cup of yoghurt and a hot tea, then later asked the hip, blonde, Dutch-language speaking barrista to refill my water. Suddenly wondered if that was one of those “casual American” things that Europeans consider gouche. Her reaction and the fact that she put about 12 drops of hot water in my cup told me it was. Or else she’s just lazy. Or doesn’t like my hat. Some American man with a baby mistook me for a local and asked me where to buy a phone card. I credit my Jennifer Lopez hat with giving me such enormous first-impression cache. It’s fun being in weird in-between places like this where there are still lots of American accents around as well as languages being spoken that I can honestly say I’ve never heard before whatsoever. But of course its Europe because everyone is drinking capuccino from impossibly small cups that would be recognized, of course, in my home country as rip-offs-- Americans being as volume conscious as we are. Anyhow, you can pick out the Americans for a mile because they are all either fat and round in a very specifically American way or having intellectual or possibly pseudo-intellectual conversations about “the world marketplace” and their “work in Africa,” and extremely fit and organic looking, like they personally own sheep or perhaps a llama or two.